Below you will find all the personal photo essays that were due by midnight last night (and those who came in during the wee hours of the morning). Please enjoy reading these. They are emotionally engaging. Thank you. Any received at this point are late.
Onward: This Thursday all the work for personal photo projects is due. You have three days now to put the material in order. Please refer to the blog for Monday, May 15. Read over the requirements. Send along the written material before Thursday. Thank you.
Zariah Pendergrass
It is true that you can’t buy happiness because happiness is born? It’s often hard to tell what future a baby can hold just by the look on their cute face. You could just picture such innocence in the picture that was taken when I came out the womb. Not a smile, but the bright discovery we call life. My mother would tell me how I reminded her of my brother that passed the year before just at his beginning stages of life. I wonder how that could be if she doesn't share her last moments with my sister and I. Am I living through him? She said we had the same texture of hair and the same chinky eyes. But was that enough to continue on such comparison? Once March 6th comes around my mother stays to herself. I try to cradle her from pain, but I can't. Maybe my life was meant to be lived for me and my older brother Isaiah. Those chinky eyes hold truth to most situations. Often now people are mesmerized at how I can predict such actions or thoughts. It's just initiation I say, but honestly I don't know what it is. I was so happy, filled with delight at the sight of such different colors, sounds, and texture. Every baby is born with pureness and innocence. But does that leave when we grow up and go through life? Growing up I've always created my own world. My world where I can be happy or satisfied with just me. Where no one can fill my head with disappointment or judgement. I enjoyed being alone and getting to know myself. But even after all this time I don't know who I am or who I'm meant to be. Those days in church where I picture myself wandering the world with a happiness filled heart was that all a dream? Now it just feels like I'm living to live. Not because I'm happy but because we were told to live. Though babies are new to the world they have such weight of the world on them. No matter how you were raised life with hit you with a twist you may or may not come back from. As any human being you are suppose to stay strong and hold your head high. But how? I seem to question everything because half of the time I don't know myself. Sometimes those cute eyes are hard to read innocence is cute until it's ruined by the weight of this world. The cycle repeats itself. The mother goes through something so tragic the child seems to go through it too. Is the child suppose to seek a way out of the troubled situation? Is generational curses real? The pain that's carried through each womb from years upon years. The women in my family were never really happy. So where does that lead me? I wasn't taught to deal with things I was taught to keep going no matter what. So maybe those beautiful eyes told a fib. Because now the innocence is gone and I'm just living without MY purpose.
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Adrianna Lester 5/16/17
remembering 13
At
the age of 13 I was in the 8th grade and my priority was getting out
of middle school and going to a high school were I would be comfortable. At the age of 13, life was really easy for
me, I didn’t have any problems or concerns.
In 8th grade I found my passion at my middle schools first
talent show. When I won first place I knew that I wanted to sing for the rest
of my life. I went to a school that was all about academics and discipline, not
that I was a bad child but that was just the environment of the school. At 13 I was trying to figure out who I was
and what my purpose was in life. I really didn’t have that many friends and the
“friends” that I did have weren’t really my friends. I was a really good
student and very smart, but when it came to math it was a done deal for me. My school
at the time was right down the street so I didn’t have to worry about taking
the bus , which was awesome , especially for a little girl who nothing about a
city bus. Since I was an 8th grader and that was the highest grade
at my school, all of the 8th graders got to go on a trip that I picked
out. So at my middle school we did
something called auctions and we had to bid on the different prizes with our
scholar dollars. So one day I won a trip to friendly’s with one of my favorite
teachers and my principle and I was able to bring one friend at the time. Before we went on the little trip, my teacher
told me to think about a trip and then bring it up while we were all eating.
When we got there I brought up Cedar point which was the coolest place to me in
the world at that time. My principle thought about and he decided to let us go
for our final trip. Of course I had been to cedar point already for my past
birthday, but I wanted to go again and I wanted others who hadn’t gone to
experience it to. We went and we spent the whole weekend there, we ate Wegmans
in PA, and we went to a little place called swing and things which is like
Rochester’s club house. When we came back it was time for our graduation which
was sad and awesome at the same time because I was getting ready to step into a
whole different ball game. Over the summer I couldn’t work because I wasn’t I
didn’t turn 14 until July which was a bummer. So I volunteered for one of my
mom co-workers which was horrible at least to me. I had to do garden work which
I don’t mind, but I had to watch kids which I wasn’t feeling at that age, plus
I didn’t really like the environment.
Overall 13 was a great year for me and it was the start to something
that lights me up inside.
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Rosalia Rosario
A baby
picture can show a lot. Even in the young stages of someone life. I cannot
remember that day really, because I was only a couple months old but I can go
by the things my parents or my family tells me about that day. The picture was
professionally taken. Sitting down on a white quilt and not knowing what was
going on but I can trust it because my mother was holding my back up behind the
sky blue back splash. There was a bear in the picture too. I do not know if the
bear meant something significant to me, it had to it was in the picture with
me. I do not remember my dress or my small socks but they were yellow and but
the picture it had some sort of grayish black animal printed on it. My ears
were pieced I had small golden studs. The golden bracelet wrapped around my
wrist and the necklace around my neck. I wore a headband that day. It was white
and had a small bow on the middle. I had a full head of black hair. My face
expression seemed to be the highlight of the photo. I smiled but was not
looking at the camera. I don’t know if the photographer wanted it to be like
that or someone in the crowd was trying to make me laugh and my target was
them. My smile and my eyes big and bold. Behind me was a small hill of the
white fur quilt I was sitting on. I think that was my mother’s hand holding me
up.
Who was
I then? I was innocent and pure. My life was clean. I hadn’t had any problems
in my life or has yet to create any for other people or myself. I hadn’t had a
first heartbreak or a first anything. No major event or occurrences that I
could have known about that young had happened that would change my life. My
life meant something to everyone else and I didn’t think about what my life
meant to me. So young and small only crying, eating, pooping, and peeing I was
spotless, I was a baby and didn’t know anything. I knew my mother and I knew
she would not leave me behind. From what my family told me my real father was
never in the picture. Everyone would say I looked just like my father.
A baby picture can mean many things
to someone. When I was young, I would always say I wanted to be just like my
mom. She was the only one I knew that made me happy. Some things in the photo
still seem a blur to me but I know my baby picture still means a lot to my
family because they can look at how I was back then to how much I’ve grown and
become a young lady. Now im 17 and about to graduate.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Joshua Pettway
Free Spirit
In this
photo I’m maybe 3 or 4 honestly I don’t know, when I was young I wasn’t extremely
social even with family. My mom remembers me as this goofy kid who’d just run
around making noises to communicate wasn’t much for talking either, but I
remember just being a kid who was scared of attention. I didn’t talk to
kindergarten at least much I maybe said a few words the first 4 years of my
life. I hated photos and cameras everyone would stare and it’d freak me out,
but my mom still loved to take pictures. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my
childhood for the most part just running around in the mood pretending to be a
fire fighter by myself or building little ant cities out of mud. I loved the
outdoors as a kid hated coming in the house but still was the same person I am
now goofy and quiet always being an ass. Even that tiny my goal was to be a
firefighter back then, I honestly recognize the person in that photo, only
thing that’s changed is he’s a little more grown up and strong with the dream
of being a firefighter still, but Just a United States Marine first. Which
probably was on my mind back then since I adored my dad who once was a Marine.
I remember one thing very well; about the day
this picture was taken, we were at my great Aunts house out in Greece and it
was late my great great grandma was living with my aunt full time and I had
just come out from laying on her chest, for the life of me I couldn’t find my shoes
so I gave up and went outside anyway. My cousin had been going around posing
with her legs crossed all day so I thought it’d be a nice joke to do it with
her, My uncle was surprised it was the first time I wasn’t running, hiding or
crying to get out of a photo, at that time I wanted to be the goofy kid that I
had been that was the point. I still felt love and safe around my family at
this time things were a lot simpler because I didn’t understand what was going
on 90 percent of the time. I always go back to this place in a bad spot, the
little garden in my great aunts backyard, it’s my place of peace and serenity. The
more I look back this photo I want to go back, to a time where I didn’t have to
understand what was going on and the thing I had to focus in on was learning
social ques and do’s and don’ts. I was a kid that just loved the fact that I
was breathing albeit scared of just about everything but I enjoyed everything
and being outside was better than playing a videogame or watching TV. I enjoyed
the simple things in life but to me they were the best thing the world had to
offer.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Sean Frisch
In this image as me as a child, I was around the age of two and three. After studying this photo from 15 to 16 years ago, it shows great facial expressions between me and my older sister, as well as good body positions. My body position was like I was born to take photos, based on my hand movements and me bouncing up and down on the couch. I was smiling very hard and seemed happy to have my juice. It seemed as if I was happy to take this photo due to the flash of light, to create a moment that I could always look back on. In my life, I was young. I was sitting on the couch drinking my juice and i remember my sister sitting on the floor next to me. As well as my mom, saying, “Say Cheese!” to make me react with a jolly smile for the photo. For the moment, my expectations were to watch cartoons, play with my sister and drink my juice. But mother’s always wanted to take photos of their children, so at that moment I smiled and seemed happy to take this picture. My expectations for the long run, was to have fun and eventually get a “big-boy” cup to drink my juice from, because I know my father and mother wanted me to learn things while I was young, so my long run expectation was to learn how to do new things. Another expectation was to have fun and enjoy all the moments as a child because once you get older, you can’t have as much fun and also are more restricted to certain things. This moment, I can compare it to where I am now. Because I still have that smile and sense of humor, as well as me trying to learn new things and continuing to grow up. Also, I can compare that to where I am now because that young man turned out to be me, and i've never changed and never will because I know the real Sean and that Sean was very helpful and outgoing no matter what! When I was little, I always wanted to be like my father, and now I am being just like him around this age, but I’m trying to be better than him as well. I want to be myself now! Back then, I was a cute little boy, that was spoiled and wanted everything that everyone else had. As well as, I was a sweet young boy that was learning how to use manors and grow up, even tho I would always fight with my sister over the littlest things. As you can tell in the image, my sister would make silly faces towards me to make me laugh and gave me all the attention that I ever needed. This image has good lining, as well as pattern that catches my attention too. I have no regrets within that moment because everything you say or do, is apart of life and you must overcome many obstacles as a child, and as well as when we get older. This image makes me look as if ‘i'm not myself because it’s so old and I look a lot different, so basically I would claim myself as a stranger as well.
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Avana Davis
I honestly do not remember taking this picture, but I do
remember where I was at. I was in my father’s Cadillac, so I am sure that he
was the one who took the picture. At that time, I could honestly say that I
lived for the moment. We probably were going somewhere that day, because I know
my dad use to take us everywhere. I noticed it had to be cold because I had on
a sweater and I know my mom put me in those tube socks that almost reaches my
knees. She does the same thing. Something else to look at is that my outfit
popped out from the background, because my sweater is a light pink and my pants
are a light tan. The rest of the car is black and brown. I also noticed that I
was looking off to the side of the camera and laughing, so he had to be doing
something funny at that moment. My expectations in the long run was to make it
to where ever we were going. Moreover, compared to now, I am the driver and
young adult that is going somewhere in life, but once again I do not know where
I am going. Back then, I was shy and impulsive. Now I am very out spoken and
still impulsive. Also I have more hair and I’m more fashionable than I was back
then. I remember the smell of a Cadillac car because my father owned many, so I
cannot identify which one I was in. However, it smelled like leather and old
people. In addition, I did not like the seats in the summer time because when
you had on shorts it would burn your thighs and butt. The seat buckle I am
grabbing, I once got in the car and sat against it in the summer time and
burned my arm. I never was a big fan of Cadillac’s in the summer. Overall, you
can tell it was a happy and loving atmosphere. We were going somewhere and my
older siblings were coming to. That smile came from a very happy and care free
place in my life.
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Katherine Scardino
Baby photos
tend to emphasize one of two things: a crying baby, or a happy one. Everyone
loves photos of a crying baby, they can generate nostalgia for the most
difficult moments of life. In contrast, everyone loves a photo of a happy baby.
These snap shots show the brightest moments of childhood. All the first times,
all the simple joys that only children can experience.
My sister and I experienced many of these first times
together, and almost all the happy days were both hers and mine. When you are
very small even the littlest hill seems like a mountain. Climbing to the top of
that mound seems like a big accomplishment, and is almost as fun as running (or
rolling) down it later. This photo captures one of the few moments of rest in a
toddler’s life. My sister and I both ignore the camera, facing instead a figure
just out of sight. I have no way of knowing if we were looking at my father, my
mother, or simply a goose walking by. It could have been a flower, a car, or
just an extra tall blade of grass. When you are a small child all of these
things are worth looking at. It is a moment of happiness and serenity, sitting
next to my sister with all the naturalness in the world. Our faces are bright
and sunny, mirroring the light of the park around us.
There are few expectations one has
when they are only one and a half years old. At that age, you live in the
moment. In that moment, I was wide-eyed in a world that seemed so big. A park
that I could stride across now with ease was an endless field of grass and
dandelions. I had no idea the true size of the world, the countries and oceans
and miles in it. Yet somehow the world seems smaller now than it did then. Not
just because I can no longer fit into play ground swings either. There are
higher expectations from life now. Though I can still sit in the grass with my
sister, an activity that pleases regardless of age, I now have more foresight
into what happens after we move from the hill. Children are more easily
contented than adults. And though I have yet to become a full adult myself, I
know that I already want more out of the world than that small toddler did. A
dandelion blowing in the breeze or a passing goose will not make my dreams the
way they once did. This is not necessarily a bad thing, in fact many would call
it a very good thing. High expectations can be good motivators for living a
fulfilling life. Yet sometimes I wonder if we couldn’t all do with a bit more
of the toddler spirit. To sit on the grass and not think about what happens
when you get up. To not worry about looking at the camera. To spend the time
only thinking about what is right in front of you, what is just out of frame.
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Taijanah Jackson
This picture was taken when I was in the fourth grade and I was nine years old. This picture consist on me (top right), my little sister Tatiana (bottom left), my older cousin Serenity (top left), and my little cousin Jyra (bottom right). I remember where this picture was taken. It was taken in the living room of my aunt Desiree house and I believe it was taken by her boyfriend at the time who is my little cousin Jyra’s father. One of the first things I noticed in the picture that remind me of my childhood is the movie case to the movie Narnia. That was one of my favorite movies as child and I've seen every single one. This picture shows how close I used to be to my little sister and my little cousin because I had my hand on both of either shoulders. My older cousin seems to be a little bit more distant which was how her personality was and still is. She a bit more of an introvert and this picture showcases that.
This picture was a good reminder of how our family dynamic was at the time. Around this time we spent a lot of time with my aunt and her boyfriend at the time. We used to go to the beach, to amusement parks and out to eat with them all the time. I remember when I was at that age my mom always color coordinated my hair ties to my outfits which was how it was in this picture. I was wearing one of my favorite shirts with pink sleeves and my mom put pink hair ties in my hair.
My emotions were really different from where they are today. That this time school wasn't that big of a stress and I felt like I had my whole life ahead of me as opposed to now I feel like I have to have everything figured out and my whole life had to be mapped out for the next five to ten years. At this time I was in a really happy place. I didn't have anything to worry about and the biggest stress in my life was thinking about what I was going to wear to school the next day and if I was going to be able to go to a friends party. My mind and the image of myself had not yet been distorted by the influence of social media and my peers. I had no desire to watch what I ate or worry about what everyone was going to think of me. I wasn't so self conscious and so self centered. I didn't care about the size of my waist and the color of my skin. I wasn't concerned with what others thought of me. Looking back at this picture I would give anything to be that child again. To be carefree and really mean it.
When this picture was taken the influence of social media wasn't so focused in my life but now it's apart of life and even my little sisters like at the age of twelve. This picture was a snapshot of a moment in my life. I will never be that little girl again. I can only see her, remember her, and grow from her just like I will as the person I am today.
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Jacob
Dillon
The stranger From A Few Years Back
When looking at the child in
this photograph, it is hard to imagine what he might have been thinking about.
It is easy to imagine him complaining about the itchy, uncomfortable sweater he
was forced to wear. It is also easy to imagine him complaining about having to
take photos since him and I still share that trait. However, it is difficult to
imagine what he would have been think of at the time.
When I was young, I remember
not being really concerned with my future. I was not sure what I wanted to do
but I wanted to do something fun. I wanted to have a job where I was out doing
stuff, where I was active in the community, so that I could help people. I
wanted to be a police officer or a firefighter or something where I could just
be out in the world doing something. However, I was not really someone to
consider the risks of my actions. I do not think I could ever do a job that
required me to put my life at risk on a daily basis. I never thought about the
fact that police officers or firefighters could be severely injured or even
killed on the job.
Looking at the photo, you can
tell that I was uncomfortable. I specifically remember being surprised to find
out that the block with the fur on which my arm was rested was just a crate
with a blanket on it. I could not believe that something appearing so
comfortable would just be as hard as a rock. I remember asking why the block
was so hard, and the photographer answered by saying “It needs to be hard,
otherwise it wouldn’t help you keep your posture."
When I was young, I remember
seeing the world through different eyes. I thought that the world was carefree
and that anyone could do whatever they wanted. I believed everything in life
would be simple. I didn't think about the rules and regulations of everything.
I thought doing something was as simple as just doing it. I didn't know you had
to put a lot of hard work and dedication into something just to achieve that
one thing.
As you continue to look at the
photo, you can start to notice something about the facial expression. You start
to notice how unusual the smile is. It looks disingenuous and forced as if I
did not want to smile. Maybe it is just because children do not like being told
what to do or maybe I just didn’t like getting pictures taken.
I remember, when I was a child, I hated the idea
of being told what to do. I was really independent and wanted to do things my
way. I wanted to do things on my own because it felt good to complete things by
myself, was as simple as that. I would try to figure things out by myself
instead of asking for help even when I had no idea what to do. It felt great to
do something, without any help, even if you messed up and had to try ten times,
because knowing that you did was the best feeling possible.
When I look at my past self, I see a child, but I
still see myself. I really haven't changed that much. I may have gotten older
but I'd say that, for the most part, I'm still the same person. I can still see
myself doing things today that I would have done all those years ago.
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What Am I Doing Here?
By Réyenne Stevens
I hate taking pictures. I hate posing for pictures. I moan and groan…even frown when asked to take pictures. I don't spend time taking selfies like everybody else does. Just leave me alone in my corner to take a nap. Leave me alone to enjoy listening to my music. This assignment had me going through all of my old pics. Looking at how things were a little less complicated.
As I look at the picture I chose, I remember exactly what was going on. It was early in the day, I was 12 years old…close to turning 13. My moms photographer friend Mr. Daron offered to do a photo shoot of me. I really didn't want to take any pictures but my mom convinced me to do it. Her selling point was that we had not taken any pictures since my dad had passed away 2 hears before that.
We met somewhere in the city, I do remember it wasn't a park. It was a big long graffiti wall. At that time I was asked to pose in front of that wall…I could not figure out a pose. I had no clue on what to do…how to pose…what face to make. I wasn't really comfortable taking pics. This was not my thing. I still was not feeling this photo thing.
I remember Mr. Daron making jokes about me because I was just complaining the whole time. That helped to make the moment not so awkward for me. He caught me in the middle of saying, “What do you want me to do?” Then he had the nerve to have me get in a tree for a pose. I was so scared, I didn’t stay in that tree long! I just wanted this photo-shoot to be over. My aunt was at the photo shoot trying to guide me through poses. That didn't help because again…I wasn't comfortable. At this age I am still trying to find my thing, find my look. How the heck am I supposed to know how to pose?
The background surprisingly is my favorite part of the picture. The boy in the graffiti painting behind me is flying with his backpack on. He looks like he is just carefree, soaring through life. That's how my life felt back then. Carefree, nothing major to worry about. My mom says this is her favorite picture of me because it was an off-guard picture. She said that my facial expression is priceless and it just fit with the background.
I notice that I look the same now as I did then. I am now 17 years old but I look 12 years old. My family jokes that I'm forever going to be short, looking like I'm a middle schooler. My sister was shorter than me then at 9 years old. She has now surpassed me in height and is often mistaken for the big sister. I always tell people that she is my BIG little sister...she's the baby giant and I am the LITTLE big sister. My mom tells me to enjoy the fact that I look young because when I get older I will want to look younger. She said that while all my friends will most likely look 30 when they turn 30...I will look 21 turning 30. I like that analysis...it gives me life.
At 13 we never know what we want to do, we don't know where we are going to be...we think we know everything and know nothing. I'm still the same person I was then. I'm just older, I know a little more, yet nothing at the same time, I know where I want to go, but not where I will be. I'm still weird, I'm still awkward, I still don't like taking pictures. I am nobody's model and will never be. The only thing different with me now is that I am a little more responsible, I am over this thing called school as opposed to being excited at the thought of going to 8th grade. My excitement now is the thought of graduating, walking that stage and putting all things high school behind me.
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Keoni Smith
I hardly remember this bright, sunny day in Rochester; it appears like any other at the surface, just another backyard event, where the parents brought their young children to do whatever. Well before I started school and even beyond that, family gatherings were a common occurrence. Here, I am merely a toddler, with no sense of just about anything other than basic locomotive, listening, and language skills. Whatever clothes one has as a toddler is put on without any denial, no sense of style whatsoever in some cases. As a toddler in an awfully tacky striped t-shirt, comb-over like hair, and black and red sandals of all colors, I would not have a care in the world what was on me; now, I would not even want to be caught dead in that combination of clothing. I was doing my thing by running around, getting to explore a bright environment out of the dull house. With that cheeky little smile on my face, my arms flailing freely, and my eyes full of energy, I was ready to get into whatever trouble I could possibly find myself in, without a single care or any knowledge of the potential consequences. This seems to be one of the first times I went over to my nana’s place to be part of a family gathering, as I was this miniscule toddler when she lived on the house on Clay Avenue. The house, the people, the setting is strange to me on that day. This was one of the first times I was exposed to new people, and did not know what to think of it, be it that I did not expect this; not even knowing that they were family, interactions were awkward, with me not even being able to look at a concept that was outside of my own definition of family. The other exterior relatives, strangely enough, were just as lost and had no direction as to how to go about the gathering. One person is looking towards the right, with a facial expression that shows some kind of concern; they were looking for their familiar destination, with their parents. Off to the far right, two more relatives, one that resembles my sister, are with their backs turned and interacting, making do with their own circle of fun disconnected from the other people. My sister was always a social being, and finding someone to invest conversation with was not far from her comfort zone. Once I became familiar with some of these people, I would expect to see them more often, and continue to share day after day of nothing but carefree fun. Little did I realize, schooling, moving houses, and family conflict would make this expectation far from achievable, to a point where today, I barely bat an eye if I saw them. As a toddler, I had no concept of rationalization whatsoever, and saw the world under a bright, perfect scope, where everything happens as I would like it to. This opposes the views that I have now sharply, as experiences have molded me into someone ready to face whatever door is slammed into my face, whether it would be struggles in college, the war field that is the work force, or the consequences of leaving my parents behind.
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Kiarah Phillips
As a child i never made a big deal about
taking pictures. The idea of posing for pictures somewhat frightened me as a
child, and I spent numerous amounts of time figuring out how to pose
“correctly”. At the time, i was more focused on running and moving around then
standing still for a few minutes to take a photo;the idea never amused me.
Now
that i am looking back at this time-frozen photograph of me, i can see how
happy i was in youth. I was just starting middle school, and here i am at the
end of high school looking back at how it all began. The outfit that my mother
picked out for me made me feel delightful. I loved how i was matching in hot
pink and black. The pink feathered earrings is what brought them out to me. The
leggings also had a black vertical line near the bottom that i had loved. The
gold also made my outfit seem more put together.The gold colored buttons that
lined up perfectly with the belt helped accentuate my hips. My body was tilted
slightly to the right so that some of the buttons would shine in the light. The
clip in my hair that my mother had styled made a half-up half-down look. I
loved it; even though my head was throbbing from the clip. I was ecstatic to
show my best friend Niya my outfit
I
had a growing love for the apartment complex that i was living in, and i still
do. After a rough start with family issues, i had grew to love the
neighborhood, and the friends that came along with it. It seemed that my
expectations for the moment was to show my friends my outfit and have fun at
the dance i was attending, and for the long run was to simply enjoy my life to
the fullest and to move on to the eighth grade. At the time, life was good; and
i couldn't imagine it to be any other way.
Looking
back at this picture, i would do anything in my power to recreate that exact
moment. Life was good, and i was content and very happy with the life that i
was living. In that moment, everything seemed amazing, the way that the evening
sun hit my face, the warmth of the spring weather made everything seem better
than it was. As my eleven year old self, i wouldn't trade that moment for the
world.
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Ler Tha Taw
In that photo, those people are my family. This photo taken in Thailand Refugee camp. Those adults in the back are my mother and my grandmothers. The kids are my siblings and I. My expectations for the moment was to look at the camera. If only the photographer chose different of us or retake the picture, my face might show. We took this photo because we are refugees , and we took it for counting who are the refugees people.
My long run, it's been 17 years ago. I didn't know where I will be like now. Who am I! I didn't know left hand, right hand. All I know was sleep, playing , and eat. I don't know where I belong. Now I'm in the place where more than million people never been. A place where, I get most freedom! A place where I can choose who I want to be. Mine decision, not my parent, nor other people. Place where I get enormous education. There no lack education. Can't say enough. America change the way I have to be.
Look at her, she didn't even smile, maybe she didn't know what's going on. As her mother told her to hold the number, she did but she doesn't know why!. Imagine if she looking straight at camera, I would be so proud to see her now. Look at her house(background) , it made by bamboo and large leaves to cover the top. You can say, poor! Lack of opportunity she needs! If I have had a better house, better school, better in everything I have, I would been a different person by then. I wonder what she looking at? Why she looked away? Why didn't she look at the camera? Why not the photographer isn't say anything ? Why choosing this photo when two kids didn't pay attention to the camera? Everything in there seem fun. Even though my house is made up with woods and the wall are bamboo and the roofs are make up giant leaves, I look happy. No worries and didn't even bother care! Now this photo effect me when I look at it. I always ask why did I look away! There is no answer but that girl is no longer little and young. She no longer live in that place . She moved away with her family and now she lived in America with enough better life. I become young adult now and the little I called She was me.
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Jayde B
Growing up in a family of five, it was very hard for me to be the center of attention- especially after my younger siblings were born. Being the oldest, however, has its perks. One of them would be the fact that my parents documented every moment of my prepubescent years through the use of photographs and film. They were parents, for the first time, and were absolutely captivated with parenthood and the new addition to their lives. The stapled and famous moments of my childhood were riddled with attention. My first steps, my first book, my first trip to disneyworld. These and many others are outlined in our red-and black splashed family photo album that is speckled with blue, pin pricked with white and slurred small teddy bears. The entire book, with the exception of a few later added photos, were of me and the people around me at a young age. Many would call me spoiled- in my eyes, however, there wasn’t much else for these young, first-time parents to pay attention to.
Now, looking back through the laminated pages of that memory-filled book, all I could see were the same photos, over and over again. My face had become one that I had grown tired of seeing, and I was very restless. My mom decided to pull out a bag full of envelopes that read words like “Walmart Film Center” or “Tops Film Processing.” She sat me down and pulled out about eleven envelopes of memories. The packages were all stuffed with strangers. College roommates and friends; family members... many of whom I see very often nowadays, only featuring faced stuffed with youth and naivety. Photographs of cousins and aunts and uncles with smooth faces and large smiles that I’m accustomed to seeing smeared away by the trials and strife that is life.
Finally, I came across a collection of black and white photographs, taken with an older camera with a flash that found lighting in the darkest of rooms. I sat on the black and white carpet in my parents’ living room, a rug that I remember from my childhood home. I was wearing overalls and a baby’s long-sleeved shirt that looked a size too big. In reality, it isn’t. Or at least, it wasn’t when my parents purchased it for me. I never learned how to crawl; only skipped from a sitting position to an ambient half-drag-half-kick across the floor that I was famous for. After that was my period of walking, or I should say, running to the base of the stairs so I could climb up. This would cause my parents to come and bring me back to the bottom, and I would do it all over again. This persistent mischievous nature was stapled across my forehead and imbedded in the dimple of my chin. Those two front teeth were starting to poke out, and an arm extended to my ear and then gums- rubbing in a way that is signature to teething infants.
This was back when life was simple. The photographer was my mom’s closest roommate, and my godmother. This would is a stranger to me and I only know her face from the one photo taken of her that is tucked away in the photo album. She is standing with a sly half smile, pencil tucked behind her ear, and camera in hand. Yeah, life was simplistic at most. I had no way of knowing where I would be one day. I had know way of predicting that the large glob of drool that hung from the base of my chin would one day turn into just-as-large tears that taste like salt and feel like dumbbells. Tears that helped me to hide behind my true feelings in public and helped me to be the carefree, happy person that I show off. Those baby tears from teething at an age of seven months mimicked the same transparency of a mirror, showing the future that a seventeen-year-old has in store for her.
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Tonyeisha Brown
Past images can give you something to reflect on. Reflection upon yourself can give you a certain outlook on life life. The image presented is a medium shot. The setting is displayed, all while showing the facial expressions and gestures of my brother and I. Six year old me in Manning, South Carolina smiles while wrapping my arm around my smiling little brother. Even though the way my brother is a step up and looks like he is hovering and showing his protection over me, the way my arm is wrapped around my little brother represents the protection that is felt over my brother. The way my head is risen up while looking in the camera shows proudness. The proudness of having a brother, of being a sister. My goofiness is shown the way my father’s hat is sitting upon my head. The hat is so big that my head is now at an angle. At that point in my life, the expectations were to continue being the proud sister that I am and to always be the happy, playing kid who loves to run around and play. Being the kid I was, I was a kid who played, who was happy. Whether that was by myself or with others. Expectations for the long run was to continue always to be a happy kid, a proud sister, and to continue being close with my brother. Happiness is where I am in my present life. The closeness with my family is still something I am most proud of. There are many success experiences over the years that will always be my proudest moments. However, I am no longer a kid. Even though you want to, you cannot just play, run around, and have fun all the time when you are a young adult. Happiness is not an always thing. There are responsibilities in life now. The focus is what comes next. What is the next step? Not what do I want to play, or with whom I want to play with. The point in my life where the focus is towards my education, earning money by working, and to pay bills. Things are not as simple when you grow up and are growing. The realization is that you cannot always be a child. When I was a kid, the expectations were not about the stressors that young adults and adults have to face in life. The expectations were not about all the responsibilities that come into play that you face. The thought on the mind is not about how much you will need to do this or to get that. The thought is not on how do I get further in life and how do I continue to build my life. Play, run, smile and to be happy. Expectations.
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Alannah Scardino
In this
image, I am not sure what I was thinking or who I was. I am not sure that I was
thinking anything at all, as I was too young to have a conscience. The only
thoughts that may have jumped into my mind would have been about the new things
I was seeing each day, such as a man dressed in an Easter Bunny costume or a
new kind of flower; where I could find comfort and food; and why the girl in
the photograph sitting next to me was important.
That girl,
my twin sister K.J. was my entire life back then. She still plays a major part
in my life to this day, and remains the most important person in the world to
me, but back then she was the single most familiar, comfortable thing that I
knew. She was more satisfying to be with than my favorite stuffed animal. You
can lose a stuffed animal, forgotten at the park or torn up by the family dog,
but you cannot lose the bond between twin sisters who have been side by side
for all of their lives.
Looking at this photograph, I recall both
K.J.’s and my earliest memory: we were separated into two different cribs and
both decided that we wanted to be closer to each other. K.J. climbed up over
the side of her crib, then plummeted to the floor, not having much depth
perception as a toddler. I cried first, seeing her fall, then she followed my
lead. We can’t imagine she was hurt by the fall, we were just hurt that we
still remained separated.
In not just
this photograph, but hundreds of others that clutter family photo albums, my
sister is by my side, though she is not just my sister. She is my source of
comfort and stability in the world. She is my source of everlasting unconditional
love and friendship, and it is so easy to see why our bond was as strong as it
was, as still as strong as it is. To this day, I do not consider her a sister.
I do not consider her a friend. I could never label her as something as shallow
as a sister or friend. To me, she is Katie. She is K.J. She is the person who,
from all points of my life, has been by my side and has given me security.
Knowing that there is someone next
to you who has experienced everything you have is securing. Knowing that
someone you met before you were born is and will always be next to you,
supporting you and encouraging you, is securing. Comparing my closeness to her
at that age is remarkable, in hindsight, as I was able to recognize even then
what true closeness and reassurance was. I was able to prioritize her at an age
where I didn’t even know what the word “prioritize” meant. Reflecting on our
photographs together always instills in me a reminder that she has always been
by my side and always will be.
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Jose Alicea
The smile was a genuine innocent one. No worries other than what would be the next adventurous stop at our family trip. As a look back at this picture, I remember the shy, introvert me, who would always keep to himself unless he was around family as I was in this picture. Even the resemblance of my father and I both looking at the camera the same way speak for itself as this was around the time I started looking for a figure, and I had my father there. I started copying and studying how he carried himself, hence why I started even copying his faces. I was confused in a sense around that time, I did not understand I still had to be who I was which I understand now. Around this time I did not have an actual clue on what i wanted to do on the long run other than I thought I had to do something that would make my parents proud. Somedays I woke up feeling realistic and wanting to for example study the law and pursue a career in that field, other days i woke up believing I could do anything, even something as unlikely as a professional athlete. It is something I can laugh at now ,but that was the beauty of being young as I was in this picture, noone could tell me otherwise and no one opinion could defer me from an ambition I had. Now , I am more understanding of what is going on around me but that feeling that I can do whatever I put my mind to is still there, just in a different more mature way. I wanted to live my life at a thousand miles an hour, now that I’m here I know to take each day one day at a time. It was as if I thought I had to complete everything I wanted to do in a day which is laughable to me now. The kid in that picture was exactly that, a kid. A kid who lived life as if there was no tomorrow, good because part of that trait stills carries on today as I get ready for the next part of adulthood, but also a negative at the time when patience was still not something known to me. I had this picture painted in my head, 22 year old graduating from college, starting my own family, car and own house. I still believe all that is possible but I see the flaw in that picture now, I was naive enough to not think about all the trial and tribulations it would take to get there and I was always prone to putting a time limit on when everything was gonna be done. This picture as I reminiscence about the time, has taught me a lot not only about then but now. The picture itself is a lesson to be told and nothing is better than being able to learn about about oneself then from one’s past.
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Rashid Pendleton
In that exact moment I was truly happy. I managed to show my happiness through the wide smile I gave for the picture. The flash from the camera caused the faint squinting of my eyes, but it also gave my eyes a light sparkle like the sun does when it reflects off of clear water. My body position wasn't completely a decision I made on my own. It was influenced by the photographer and the rest of my family. They wanted me to sit on the floor next to my older cousin to symbolize the age both the age and size difference. In the midst of all of this, I still made it my own with the placing of my hand on my knee and leaning back a little.
The smile I gave nearly blinded the cameraman, which made me a key focal point. The same way I was in my parents life. At that time I was the only child, I got whatever I wanted from my family all I and to do was smile, but I continued to live day by day. I didn't worry about what I would do tomorrow or a few seconds later, I only worried about what was happening now. My long run consisted of the few seconds I spent in the spare moment when I made my decision without thinking about the consequences that can come after. I was just a typical little boy, who loved to have fun and getting into things I shouldn't be in. I was stress free. I like to think of myself as a small leaf riding the current of a small stream. Not only because my life was depending on the actions of my intermediate family, but because I was a small kid lost in a big world. Yet, I was happy with the way things were.
Comparing that point in my life to where I am now, you wouldn't think I was the same person. At the age of eighteen I’ve lost all of the key beliefs I held as a child. I don't see myself as the lost leaf in the stream, but as a small tree just beginning to sprout flowers. Trying to figure out where I should go after I completed the step in my journey I'm on. The biggest differences besides my weight and age is my thought process.When i was younger I didn’t care about anything that was happening in the at that moment, but now I think about my future constantly now. I probably think about it the same way the elderly think about it, asking myself will tomorrow ever come or will I stress myself out to my death today.
If I retake the picture now with the exact same clothes and facial expression, you wouldn't see a young peaceful child. You'll see a young man working on himself to be better than what everyone expects of him. You’ll see how much growing up in this world has change me, but shockingly I wouldn't want it anyother way.
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Nuria Osman
A Decade ago
Isn’t funny and weird how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything's so different? When I look at this picture, I am always amazed on how fast life is going. Personally- day by day, I feel as if life is going very slowly and nothing is changing; but when I look at my life, even two years back, I realize that things have changed and I’ve grown up mentally and physically.
2007, a year of simplicity and various adventures. This picture is exactly a decade old. I smile looking at this picture, appreciating the crystal clear skin I once had. I usually don’t remember the details behind pictures I took more than three years ago, but this one portrait stuck to my memory. In this photo I was very oblivious to what was to come. I wasn’t concerned about many of the things that are significant topics today. In this picture, I didn’t know that my best experiences in life were yet to come; like the experience of getting a chance to go back to my birth country and meet amazing people. The years after this portrait was taken were the ones that made me the person I am today.
A smiling eight year old girl, with a blurred out classroom setting; I believe I was in the third grade when this picture was taken. I remember my homeroom teacher taking my picture, so I could add it to the back cover of the books we were publishing, for the authors information. Thinking back to this time, I remember being excited to make my very own book, and being able to use my creative imagination. But after having to do my own illustrations, I realized that publishing a book wasn’t easy, so I also remember slowly losing motivation to finish the work I started. Nonetheless, I finished the book, even though it was visible that I was getting tired of coloring, because the drawings were getting less detailed and drawn with less effort as the pages went on. Publishing my own book helped me see how far I’ve come as a student. I still laugh whenever I read my third grade author biography, I laugh because I’ve changed so much, especially my future occupational goals. In the third grade I wrote in my autobiography that I wanted to become a professional ballet dancer, and now I have no interest in dancing. This book made it clear to me on how times have changed.
Looking at this picture now, I can proudly say; I love the person I’m becoming. I’m honestly proud of myself at this point in my life. I am close to reaching the long run goal I had in this picture. I am less than a month away from high school graduation, and on my way to college. I feel as if, I’m exactly where I am suppose to be in life, and I appreciate every experience I’ve had; even the setbacks.
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Joshua Martinez- Mercado
In the picture that I brought in, I was probably around 1 or 2 years old. In the picture, I was smiling and seemed very happy at the time. When I was a baby, I would be happy most of the time, unless I didn’t get what I wanted. My mom would always say that when I was little, I would get on the floor and get mad and start crying when I didn’t get what I wanted. When the picture was taken, I wasn't looking towards the camera, I was probably looking at my mom or dad. The relationship I had with my parents at the time was good. We would always spend time together and with our family. When she would take pictures of me, I would always be smiling in most of them showing that I would always be happy and having a good time as a baby. In the picture, I was sitting down on a bed, with a hat, chain and diaper on. I had my right hand on the hat like if I were to take it off or change how it was on my head and my left hand was on my knee area. When I was little, I would always have something on my head and I would always be trying to take it off. In the picture, I was sitting down and when I was a baby, I would always be on the floor when I was home, or at a relative's house.I still remember the things that I did and happened to me when I was little like, riding my uncle's horse for the first time by myself, going to my favorite park, riding my bike and falling off of it busting my chin open and being held down by doctors while getting stitches. I had a fun but tough life when I was a baby but I was living life like every other human. I’ve came a long way in life. I was a baby living in Puerto Rico with my mom and dad, being the only child to now living with my mom, little sister and step dad, being separated from my dad, but still communicating with each other, losing my grandpa that I would visit every year in Puerto Rico, having 2 beautiful little sisters, trying to set an example for them to make the right choices in life, always keeping their heads up and focusing on school, and about to graduate high school to step into the real world and see myself growing and managing to pull through the obstacles that get in my way to success.
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Jaida Hartzog
TITLE: “A photo is always deeper than what it appears to be”
So young, so innocent, very happy but so clueless. As you gaze into my dark brown eyes, and smile back at my little smile, you and i both can tell that whatever life was bringing me soon after didn’t quit matter in this moment.
We all go through our memories and look at our childhood photos and think to ourselves “wow! I was so young”. At least I do. Not only am I thinking how young I was but I also compare how I looked then to how I look now. However, this time it’s different. Very different. As I look at this particular photo not only am I realizing how much i've grown, but I also notice how happy I was then. My smile in this photo is from ear to ear, my eyes are wide open, and my posture is held high. I look so effortless in this photo. I'm sure no one had to tell me to smile or pose it just came natural. Today if you really pay attention you’ll see a smile from time to time, my eyes are usually day dreaming worried about everything going on in my life, and my posture is forced to be held high. We all wonder why things change. Why can't we just be young again? Or why can't We be as happy as We were then?. We all have questions about life, some more then others. My question is why doesn’t it last? Happiness? Why doesn’t happiness last? I was so happy then. I had so many expectations then that I wanted to live up to so that I can be just as happy today. Mom says “you're going to be the smartest kid, you're going to go to the best schools…me and your father is going to give you the best life”. Trust me they did, at least mom did, dad didn't have the chance to but I forgave him for it. Mom did her best to give me a good childhood. She provided everything she could to make sure my siblings and I were ok. She's probably the one behind the camera capturing this beautiful photo. If so, it's my job to thank her, because I haven't smiled like this in a long time. I can honestly say that majority of the things that I wanted to do so far in my life I accomplished, but like any other human in some areas of my life I feel as though I could have done better. In school I could have aimed for higher grades, I could have listened to my mom more often, I could have stayed one last night with my father rather than rushing to go home. We all set expectations for ourselves and we beat ourselves up trying to accomplish them. If we don't accomplish them by the time we told ourselves they had to be done we feel as though we failed. In this photo I think of me preparing myself for the world. I was smiling so hard, ready to accomplish my goals and do as my mother said. In this photo I had no idea what was going to happen but I didn't really care. I was ready for whatever life was bringing me. I had no clue what god had planned for me and still today I don't. Then in that picture I was more than ready to see what my life was going to be like, and now I want time to slow down and let me deal with what's going on now. But I can't, because time goes on and we must go on to. We must fix are issues in the mix of going to school, going to work, making new friends losing old ones, getting into new relationships, reading college acceptance and non acceptance letters, grandparents dying, baby cousins being born. In the midst of all of that we are forced to carry on with our lives juggling everything at once. It's hard I will admit but it could have been worst.
while I'm sitting here reminiscing my childhood picture that's sitting right in front of me. Rather than being upset with myself for not being this perfect person that I looked to be in this photo. It’s time that I give myself credit for the things that I have done and continue to do. I'm graduating high school soon going off to college, I'm working and learning how to save money, I've gotten closer with my mom, I'm learning to accept the lost of my father, and most of all I'm writing all of my feelings without holding back. As i gaze into my dark brown eyes, and smile back at my little smile I no longer look at myself saying I wish I was that happy little girl again. That little girl never went away she's still here inside of me, and she's the only reason why I’m still here today.
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Bayleigh Nicole Thurston
Art is
how I manage. I incorporate art into everything I do, from hand drawing a
volcano for a science project instead of printing out an image to stacking
those little half and half cups up on the diner counter top. When I was young I
had a fascination for temporary forms of art. I drew on napkins, built things
out of bendy straws, played with my food, wrote in sidewalk chalk, and in the
case of this photo, made pipe cleaner creatures. Yeah, I know it is hard to
believe that little girl with the smile too big for her face is me. Only way
you can tell is to this day my hair is still a constant mess. In the photograph
I was turning six and for some unfathomable
reason even though it was early fall, Rochester was still convinced it was summer
that day, the sun pouring in through the window heated up the room. All of the
kids were restless, especially my cousin, Josh discernable as the blur and the
bottom corner of the photograph. I was fiddling with the pipe cleaner creature
I made while everyone waited in anticipation for cake, I believe it was marble
with white and blue frosting. It’s weird the things I can remember so clearly.
I remember my Uncle took that photograph. I remember Josh was annoying. I
remember my cat laying in the sunny spot next to my seat. I remember begging Ma
to let me keep my pipe cleaners while we ate, but she moved them to the seat
behind me. I remember being upset, had my parents fought? Was it because Daddy
would have to go to work later on that day? I don’t remember but it looks like
I was faking it pretty good. I think that’s what I’ve always done, faked it. I
faked like I enjoyed school. I faked like I was smart. I faked like I wasn’t
tired of everything. Eventually, as I know as a fact now, you get tired of the
façade and you slip up. You don’t live up to your potential, you don’t make
good grades, and you fail… epically. I
expected that things would get better, that with age and knowledge I
would get better. I didn’t, things just got worse and I never really got
around that bend. You fall back on the things you know because it’s easy, I
knew art. I do it better than most, I worked at my own pace, teaching myself
things most seniors don’t even know. My talent kept me on top, got me into
Rochester Institute of Technology, and defined the person I am now. When I look
at this photograph I see what it should be, a happy girl on her birthday. I see
what it is, a girl grown before her time and pessimistic of what was to come. And
I see a girl who was going to get to where I am now, but expected the trail to
be a lot different.
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Griffin Harrison
This photograph was taken by my mother, in our apartment in Boston, MA when I was a small child. I don't remember exactly how old I was, but I look to be around 1 year old. Wearing blue overalls, sitting on a bed with light shining through the unseen window in the back of the room, the picture is a medium shot capturing the smile of a small toddler that I have no memory of. It’s a strange feeling, to see a moment in time right before your eyes that you have absolutely no memory of. Yet, I know that blue-eyed child that is a past form of myself is very real, even though it seems like a distant dream. I can only imagine what i was thinking, or not thinking. I was curious, probably looking at the camera my mother using to capture the snapshot and wondering what it was that she was doing, and why. Or maybe I was just looking at her, thinking “that's my mother” and smiling because of my love for her. I was unaware of what would be coming later in life; high school, music, girls, applying to college, my little brother (who is still on the way during this moment) and everything that comes with growing up and becoming an adult. I was just an innocent little boy who was new to life and still figuring out the world around him.
The facial expression that is displayed in the photograph is very pure, and genuinely happy. The smile of a toddler or young child shows how they are really feeling, because they have no reason or even thought to fake how they are expressing their emotions. The sun is shining through a window not included in the shot, and I am dressed in a short sleeve shirt and overalls, leading the audience to believe that it is either spring or summer. Nice weather often leads to happier feelings. Also, little kids react to the state of their home life. If I was looking very upset or was crying in this photo, it would be safe to assume that there was some drama going on at home. However, if this was the case, then perhaps the photograph wouldn't have been taken at all. Because my younger self is smiling and appears to be very happy, that tells the audience something about my parents and how things were at home when I was a young child. This leads the audience to inquire about what this child ended up doing in the future, and how this information gathered just from this one memory affected the little boy’s life. At this moment in the photograph, I was not thinking long term. I don’t think that I was capable of thinking that way, at that age. My long term when I was one or two years old was probably “I am hungry, I am tired, I have to go to the bathroom”. Basically, I didn’t have a long term way of thinking as a toddler; I just lived life in the moment. THis photograph allows me to take a step back in time, to a memory that I have no recollection of, yeti know existed. This is the beauty of a photograph.
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Cyrah McCullough
I
don’t know the age, I don’t know the place, but I do know I was happy. Looking
at the photo of me when I was young, already knowing how to walk and maybe even
talk a little, I wish I could live it. The single moment of my innocent youth,
frozen in time to live forever. A moment I wish to have again, yet I wouldn’t
want to taint it.
Small,
something I will never be again. I was small and just happy, most likely smiling
at my grandmother due to that fact that she had to always be in my sight or
else I’d be upset or crying for her. I was a little kid also, grabbing the
diapers for her. Even when young, I had a belly on me and wild hair. I was just
living life, not expecting anything or understand the concept of life.
Looking
at this image, it hurts honestly… It hurts me to see myself so innocently happy
for in a couple years from that picture I wouldn’t be the same. The woman that
I trusted and first saw would bring multiple tears to my eyes. Or that the
mother I was soon to live with would choose drugs and love over me. Or that a
singular person who I thought I could trust would ruin my entire life. My
childhood was to be taken from me as I care for my brother and move so much I
would forget who I was staying with. I would learn at a young age that there is
no such things as white in our world, simply grays and black. But not in that
picture.
In
that picture, I didn’t know such thing. I didn’t know that the world would be
so harsh. All I knew was my grandmother, my home, food, baths, and “Stinker
butt”. I was just living. I knew I was safe, and the monsters wouldn’t come and
hurt me. Presidents, racism, sexism, police brutality, pain- I knew none of
them. I was content and happy. Lies weren’t told, misery was foreign.
Seeing
myself in such a state hurts. It honestly makes me want to cry because I didn’t
know the truth. However, it makes me smile also. That little girl is going to
be thrown head first into this wicked world and experience firsthand the hell
that this world brings to only grow out of it as someone stronger. With all the
pain and scares, tears and cries, that little girl will grow to make such a
difference, even if the different is within the family. That little girl will
help so many people and make people smile, help people feel wanted and loved
even if it is only for a little bit. People will drag her down, people will
mistreat her, that little girl will become someone who can laugh in their face
for what they did was make her ambition become even stronger.
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Daniel Lampe
This picture of me and my mom was actually taken out of a photo book and the photos itself were taken by my dad, so you can see 2 other pictures besides that. The main focus should be the closer shot showing me and my mom in 2009. Judging by my facial expression, I was feeling myself in this vacation. You can tell, that I was enjoying the moment with my mom and that I went to the beach before, because my hair looks messy and sandy. My mom’s facial expressions are revealing, that she also enjoyed the moment with me and that we most likely went out to eat before this picture was taken, judging by her hair and her dress. All of the visible images were taken in , France on our summer vacation in 2009. I have some memory of that vacation, since it was one of the most fun vacations we had in France. I remember spending a lot of time at the beach with my parents and walking through the city we stayed in and getting fresh baguette from the bakery by myself every morning. I also remember spending a lot of time in the pool, that was in the backyard of our house. Other than that I don’t remember many other things about this vacation since we did at least 15 or more vacations since then. We go on vacation 1-3 times a year, depending on time available.
Going a little into the detail into who I was, when this picture was taken I can say that I was a stranger to myself. I was probably around 9 years old when this picture was taken and I remember having socializing problems since I was old enough to think. I was not an easy kid growing up, especially to my parents and my childhood friends. However, I always had friends that
Accepted me the way I was. I never knew how to act properly or how to socialize with people, as I mentioned. I was always just doing my own thing with the people that cared about me and that I cared about. During that time I was a huge fan of the Mario game series. Actually I was never not a huge Mario fan, since I grew up with Mario. I just graduated from Elementary school and I was excited to go to Middle school, where I would meet my best friend Nick. We are best friends for 8 years now (Just mentioning). I do not want to talk about all of my childhood, so let’s just talk about my expectations in life. I honestly didn’t have any expectations in life at that time, because I was just living day by day and enjoying what was happening at the moment. I never worried about the future. I mean even if I knew what would come, I was never afraid because I always used to tell myself “Well, that’s future Daniel’s problem”. I was just myself. Seeing myself in this pictures brings back memories that were deep inside me and that I wanted to forget. I don’t recognize myself in that picture and looking back or rethinking my memories feels like watching a movie as If I never lived through all of that. I can remember the vacations and other things I did in my life very well and it makes me feel weird, because I am such a different person now.
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Fenesse Walker
This photo was taken when I was around the age of 3. I didn’t know where life was going to take me and the obstacles that were coming ahead. In this time of age, I was the only child with both my mom and dad, I was always free of responsibilities and got everything I ever wanted. I was always a curious child and was always trying to do new things and like parents should, they restricted me from doing harmful things. Me being a child, I still did what I was always told not to do because of my curious feelings and it always ended with bad consequences. In the end I learned from my mistakes and know to always listen even if you don’t want to.
When I was younger, my father bought me a basketball hoop and basketball. I would play for hours and I always had a dream that I would become a basketball player. When I played, I used to think I was Michael Jordan and that I was the best player in the world. One day my father took me to my very first basketball game and I remember having a great time and meeting Tim Duncan, the basketball player that played for the San Antonio Spurs and me and my father took a picture with him and I still have the picture to this day.
When I was a younger I was just as happy as any other toddler was. I never really had any worries because my parents would do everything for me. I had nice clothing and shoes, and I can happily say that I was somewhat spoiled. I hadn’t learned yet that everything wasn’t always going to be handed to me on a silver platter, I would have to work for it. As I got older the more I had to work for things that I wanted and I began to notice that my parents weren’t always going to be there to hold my hand. At the time I was my mom’s little baby and all she wanted to do was buy me things and always make sure that I was okay.
This photo meant a lot to me because me and my father have built a great relationship since I was born and we have had our problems with each other in the past but we have always gotten through it. My real father wasn’t there for me but the man in my photo has been there for me since day one. I know that he will always be there for me because of the bond that we have created with each other is unbreakable. This photo is a medium shot with me and my father sticking out and the background is a wallpaper of Bow Wow. I chosed rule of thirds because of the section that me and my father are at. This was my essay on who I was as a person when I was 3 years old.
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Amanda Dala
I never was the one to smile because I don’t know how; I never take photos of myself because I don’t like anyone even myself to look at me more than they have to in real life. It’s rare for me to intentionally take a photo of myself.
It was the summer of 2005 when it was first taken. It was any hot summer day, back then I used to like the color pink and I believed in the existence of fairies. It was back when everything was so simple.My family used to go to the park everyday. I wore a pink dress with a pair of worn out gym sneakers and to top it with the classic bowl cut while my younger brother wore a moss green sweat suit as well with a bowl cut. Now thinking of it, we both had really bad sense of fashion but I couldn’t really do anything about it since it was my mother who picked out the clothes and my hair cut.( Those were really bad times.) I brought my care bear plush,which i thought it was a rainbow monkey plush from the show Codename Kids Next Door, so it could come with me ( because I had thought that stuff animals were lonely) and show it to everyone who would look at me.
When we got to the park, my mother would rush us out of the car so that she can take her daily afternoon nap. My older sister was with us, this time, carrying our almost year old baby sister. Time stopped as soon as we went out of the jeep as we played on the rusty swings and the playground palace.I never wanted the day or the afternoon to end, even played in the empty tennis court and pretend we were famous tennis players. After a while we needed to head home and my older sister decided to take a photo on the disposable camera. On that moment,the photo within a second was taken the feeling of joy forever implemented in a small piece of film showing the smiles ( well somewhat smiles )of children who gave no worry of anything.
Now as I type this paper on the transparent computer screen and the taste of nostalgia fills my lungs I asked myself what changed?
Maybe it was because I grew up knowing that not everything was all sunshine and rainbows.
Maybe it was the realization that championship
Maybe it was because of despite what everyone says about friends, it reality who really cares?
I still ask myself that question every morning and every night and still with little to no answer. I don't believe there is an answer or will there ever. The memory of that day, although still murky and cloudy, will forever bring back the nostalgic feeling of the simplicity of a normal day at the park.
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Maria Morales
Maria Morales
‘’The ignorant young girl is me “
As I look at this photo, it reminds me of this bright, charismatic, ignorant young girl I once was. I had not yet known what the future was going to bring, and where I was going to college, and if my plans were going to turn out the way I anticipated. Back in 2012 when this photo was taken it was in walmart the one located on hudson ave. I went there to take a couple 8x10 professional picture for my portfolio. When I was a kid , I always watched tv shows and young actors who lived the life that I dreamed of. I found a website for kids who plan or want to audition for a tv show for either disney channel or nickelodeon. There were always a couple of plots that caught my eye but it required me and my family to travel to get an audition, which require money that we don’t have. My mom agreed that I will do a profilo and get my picture professionally done. I went there as happy as I can be and it was a very fast process, for some reason I believed I got sidetracked and never finished my portfolio , I never went back and looked at that website again. I do not wish that I have followed through with what I planned to do, I do not wish that my family had the money to take me to one of these auditions. Back in the photo I have made those wishes but looking back it, I don’t regret my actions; Why? One may ask , well because everything that happened after this photograph has shaped me into being who I am today, I have wonderful grades in school, I am going to college in Albany, and I have so much things to look forward to the rest of my senior year. If I was to have all the things that I desired, I wouldn’t be where I am today, I would of probably wasted thousands of dollars on traveling to get more auditions maybe even in a different school if I actually made it, chances were low if Idid though. The point that is being made is that this simple photograph has made me reminisce and revive the past and recreate those moments that was happening in this picture. As of today, I no longer want to be in the industry in acting, I don’t want to be on tv I’d rather be local somewhere being a detective or a lawyer something that requires a bachelor’s degree. This photo was before I developed the beautiful took before the relationship that I have with my mother developed and I am as thankful as I can be for it.In that same year I was in 8th grade experiencing a whole new world, not knowing what kind of friends I would have and when will I mature , that was all so ignorant to me but now looking back , the choices I have made , have made me more stronger, and more brighter and shaped me to be the beautiful, and intelligent women that I am today.
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Katherine Fuss
Sea
Turtles
I’ve
always appreciated photographs and their ability to act as a visual memory. I
love looking through old photo albums from my childhood, or scrolling through
my phone’s camera roll to reminisce on fun experiences. I love looking back and
being able to see tangible documentation of those times, with hopes of being
one step closer to experiencing them again.
This
particular photograph was taken in Hawaii in 2006, and reflects the carefree
joy of myself and two of my cousins. We were fortunate enough to stay there
through my grandparent’s timeshare, and although I was young, I have very fond
memories of this trip. The weather was wonderful, the food was incredible, and
this was the first time I had ever swam in the ocean. Unfortunately, it would
be inaccurate to say I loved every minute of it- when my family went
snorkeling, I kept getting salt water in my mouth and was not enjoying myself.
I still regret not fully appreciating that opportunity, but since then, similar
opportunities have risen and allowed me to redeem myself. This photo, however,
shows the absolute delight we had while playing in the ocean. At one point, we
all laid on our stomachs, stretched out in the sand, and claimed to be sea
turtles crawling from the water. A picture of that exists as well, but it’s
buried in a photo album at my grandparent’s home in Michigan, and not quite as
accessible as this one.
I
love this photo because we are so disconnected from any stress or worries, and
are simply enjoying ourselves and our surroundings. It is so refreshing to
think back to the simplicity of our lives at the time, before we were hit with overpowering
stressors. The only thing consuming my mind was the strength of the waves, the
texture of the sand, and channeling my inner sea turtle. At that point in time,
I had no idea that many years later I would have the opportunity to swim with
actual sea turtles, on what has been the best trip of my life so far.
From
a photographic standpoint, this is a very well composed shot. The shoreline
creates a frame for the image, which surrounds us and the triangle formed by
our bodies. The rule of thirds is followed, though slightly offset, and the
texture of the water is depicted as well. And lastly, the contrast of our
bright swimsuits against the neutral water is a reflection of our playful
adolescence.
I’m
so grateful that this picture exists, and that it captures a moment of such joy
and happiness. I also love that I can revisit this trip through these images,
because, due to being so young, my detailed memories are very limited. Lastly,
this photo is a reminder to not to be distracted by any external stressors, and
instead appreciate moments while you are living them.
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Zion Ponder
02’ Innocence
I’ve seen this photo so many times and never took a second thought at what was actually happening at that moment. I hadn’t even realized it was my third birthday in that photo. Besides, I did know that I was three because that was the last time I seen the man [barely] in this picture. In my defense, I only see these old photos of me when my grandma wants to reminisce on the past times. Plus, I don’t like thinking about my past to even have the thought old photos of me in the back of my head. Furthermore, this photo and connecting it to my memories of that age leaves me to conclude that there was a sense of innocence and ignorance within me.
It’s hard to believe I looked that happy when the circumstances around me would call for much different mannerisms. Honestly, there was so much stuff I was completely unaware of - and that I am still finding out things to this day, that it amazes me. Yet, I still smile looking at this photo of me. There was so much joy and anticipation even my brother was excited. I was I stilled seemed a little shocked that I had just been placed in front of an untouched cake - being told that it was mine. My brother on the other hand was caught licking his lips just waiting for somebody to light the candles.
Projecting myself back to that time, my future was immensely uncertain. It would get even more ambiguous very, very soon. I was currently in position to be an older sibling, but like all secrets I was kept in the dark. “For all that is secret will eventually be brought into the open, and everything that is concealed will be brought to light and made known to all” (Luke 8:17). Just as a black hole, that light was consumed by darkness. Soon I was down a mother, a “father”, and a baby sister. It wasn’t at all what I expected but it was an interesting story to say the least. I only expected a tummy ache and maybe a sugar rush. Further down the road I expected living happily ever after as one big happy family. Now all I want to see is the divorce papers signed.
Losing half my family in the blink of an eye, being on the run from a family who wanted an eye for an eye, and being in danger of being orphaned was not in the plans. After my “father” implanted his seed, then dug it up all the way down to the roots, as well as well as the neighboring parent plant. This caused the farmer to feel intense anger towards my donor and family.
This caused me and my brother to go into hiding at ****. Nevertheless, I was still young, and naive, and just thought I was spending the weekend at ****. Or maybe mom and dad were just going away for business for a while.
I would’ve never imagined I would be on my way out of Rochester graduating from one of the best city schools in America. (Yet, if my mom can do it and even obtain degrees while studying in prison, I have no excuse). I wouldn’t even have thought I would ever be writing about this like this. From the picture till now, my smile and appearance stayed the same. The only thing that changed was my psyche - filled with wisdom, as well as demons. Nonetheless, I will always be my father’s son according to DNA.
Even so, I have no father.
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Samantha Burgos
Only about 8 years old in this photograph, I can't really explain who I was because to be honest, I didn't even know. Trying new things, and experiencing different things was always my cup tea. I always tried to step out of my comfort zone to determine who I really am and what I like. From this picture, you would think I was this young girly person very much into things girls are into. But what you don't know, because you cannot necessarily see it is what I was before this. Previous to the time period in my life in which the photograph was taken, I was a very small and timid girl who didn't talk, only when spoken to and it was limited. Not only was I timid around new people, I was shy around my family and my classmates. It took everything in me to answer a simple “what does 2 + 2 equal?” in school. For some odd reason, I thought when people laughed they were laughing at me. Not because they had any reason to, but just because I didn't know what was funny.
Looking at this picture 9 years later, with a more modern mindset, i'm honestly shocked that my hair was nicely pulled back into a secure bun, wore a dress, and that I portrayed a huge sense of happiness with a smile. My family members now would tell me that even they are shocked that i am as girly as I am today because as a child I seemed to be a tomboy. I do disagree with some of them because I wasn't old enough to buy my clothing or to express myself in ways that I would now. I remember the day this photograph was taken as if it was yesterday; It was sometime in June for my sisters 5th birthday party. I believe that before everyone arrived, my mom asked me to pose in the living room to take a picture to remember the day. In the photograph, I am very happy and i actually striked a posed for the picture that my mother was taking. After the picture i went about my day, and enjoyed my sister’s birthday party.
It's quite interesting to see the type of person I was nine years ago and compare it to who I am today and see how far I’ve come. I think this picture definitely gives a sense of me finding myself and the pure beginning. The summer this photograph was taken was when I started to realize that i did like wearing dresses, and doing my hair and that I actually was girly. I also found a sense of voice in myself, to portray to others. The shy Sam was breaking apart, for every right reason.
NOW?? I can have a conversation with almost anyone and I am sure of who I am. I am not shy not timid anymore. I make friends very easily and in my opinion i am very likable. I am happy with the transformation that was made.
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Wallace Foster Smith IV
The face of innocence...that was so long ago. I don’t remember the last time I’ve been able to smile with a full set of whites. Now the smiles seem come harder and less often. Lips stapled together never being able to see what lies behind them. But that stressless life of a two year old had numerous reasons to keep a smile on his face. A two parent household, a new baby sister on the way, four loving grandparents as well as four great grandparents and one great-great grandmother. Back when there was no school to worry about, no teachers, no assignments, no college planning, no essays, no final projects, and no final exams. Back when everything was given to me, didn’t have to work for those two gold chains and two gold bracelets. Looking towards the bright future with the darkness behind him he didn’t know that the light would eventually be switched on and off as often as the wind blew. That light whose switch seems so far out of reach that you just want to give up. But you can’t because you have siblings growing up behind you who view you as their role model. That role in which you had no choice but to sign up for.
You can’t let them know that you never signed up for that role though. You were the father figure that they didn’t have growing up. You were the definition of “I am my brother’s keeper” and you never complained. You were who they always went to when they needed someone. That two year old with that big smile and those full cheeks had no idea that the future would be this hard. That as a high school senior he would be lost in this big world. Oversleeping for school and falling asleep in classes because you just can’t keep those eyes open due to all the sleepless nights. All the late nights and early mornings taking a toll on his body. Eighteen years old now, two then, he just never could’ve foreseen all of the obstacles in his way. He would’ve never thought that his father would vanish for years only to return for football seasons. He could’ve never guess that him and his three siblings would be forced to live with their grandparents because mom’s working two jobs and overnights for us to always have clothes on our backs and food in our stomachs. How could he have guessed that mommy would turn out to be stronger than daddy; maybe not physically but emotionally, mentally, psychologically, and verbally. He never knew what it would be like to be separated from his younger siblings who looked up to him because he can’t transfer schools his senior year and mommy wants to move the kids out of the city so that they wouldn’t grow up in the same “ghetto” having to look over your shoulder every time you leave the house type of city. What I would do to get that two year old joy back, that stressless life, that two parent happy household, and everything else that that picture represents back. “Don’t grow up too fast”.
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Nyree Naves
Younger Me in a Nutshell
I don’t remember much about my childhood at the top of my head, but I do remember that I was a very quiet, simple kid, the kind that always kept to myself. It gave me a chance to value myself and become more observant of the things around me. For a little three-year-old girl who never really talked or asked questions, I knew a lot more things than everyone else around me would think.My antisocial trait helped me gain a new level of more than just alertness by always watching, but never saying anything.
Just looking at the picture brought back my memory somehow, I was sat down at a daycare and all I heard was someone call my name and snapping a picture of me. How my face looks can be misunderstood. I tend to have sort of a blank face but I would still describe it as having alot to say but the option to bite my tongue has taken over. Whenever I am caught off guard, I become tense and freeze like a deer in headlights, and this picture says it all. If I was never prepared to take a picture, the person trying to take an offguard picture would never get an expression from me.Having no expression can also be considered an expression in someway. However if you were to view the younger me in deeper way you would see that I was a quiet child who simply followed directions.It takes me back to the fact that I never really had any remarks about anything and just do or take whatever was given to me. Which brings me to the oufit that I had on. I believe that I was very uncomfortable in the denim on top of denim overall outfit but I didn’t complain or cried about it and just take it how it is.
I still have the same qualities today but not as much. I still had my antisocial ways but that changed once I realized that I had a passion for theatre. After realizing that I have a special talent in the sixth grade, there was no way that I was going to let it go to waste. The past six years in high school has taught me to believe that there is some value in words and that they should be used during relevant times. This is what I enjoy about life, which is that you are able to see how much you have changed over the years and how there’s more to come.
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