Wednesday, December 14 / Thursday, December 15 rewriting news leads practice

At this point everyone should have completed the passive to active voice activity. 

 Here are the correct responses.

1. The school was struck by lightning.
Lightening struck the school.
2. This morning the burglar was arrested by the police.
The police arrested the burglar this morning.
3. One type of air pollution is caused by hydrocarbons.
Hydrocarbons cause one type of air pollution.
4. An elaborate supper for the miners was prepared by Mr. Patel and his children.
Mr. Patel and his children prepared an elaborate supper for the miners.
5. The cookies were stolen by the Mad Hatter.
The Mad Hatter stole the cookies.
6. New York City's Central Park was designed in 1857 by F.L. Olmsted and Calbert Vaux.
F. L. Olmsted and Calbert Vaux designed New York's Central Park in 1857.
7. It was decided by the court that the contract was invalid.
The court decided that the contract was invalid.
8. The first commercially successful portable vacuum cleaner was invented by a janitor who was allergic to dust.
A janitor who was allergic to dust invented the first commercially successful vacuum cleaner.
9. After Leonardo da Vinci's death, the Mona Lisa was purchased by King Francis I of France.
King Francis I of France purchased the Mona Lisa after Leonardo da Vinci's death.
10. The allegorical novel Animal Farm was written by British author George Orwell during World War II.

The British author George Orwell wrote the allegorical novel Animal Farm during World War II.

11. Before the semester was over, the new nursing program had been approved by the Curriculum Committee and the Board of Trustees.

The Curriculum Committee and the Board of Trustees approved the new nursing program before the semester was over.

12. With five seconds left in the game, an illegal time-out was called by one of the players.

One of the players called an illegal time-out with five seconds left in the game.

13. Later in the day, the employees were informed of their loss of benefits by the boss herself.

Later in the day, the boss herself informed the employees of their loss of benefits. 

14,The major points of the lesson were quickly learned by the class, but they were also quickly forgotten by them.

The class quickly learned and forget the major the points of the lesson. 

15. For several years, Chauncey was raised by his elderly grandmother.

Chauncey's elderly grandmother raised him for several years

16.An unexpected tornado smashed several homes and uprooted trees in a suburb of Knoxville.

      no change; this sentence is in active voice

17. Participants in the survey were asked about their changes in political affiliation.

          The survey asked the participants about their political affiliation.

18. Tall buildings and mountain roads were avoided by Raoul because he had such a fear of heights.

Raoul avoided tall buildings and mountain roads, because he was afraid of heights.

19. "The Yellow Wallpaper" was written by Charlotte Perkins Gilman.

Charlotte Perkins Gilman wrote "The Yellow Wallpaper."

20. I was surprised by the teacher's lack of sympathy.

The teacher's lack of sympathy surprised me.

Fake news answers

   

1. Thousands of fraudulent ballots for Clinton have been found in a warehouse in Ohio. (Christian Times)

False

2. Milwaukee County Sheriff David A. Clarke is a KKK member(National Report)

false

3. Trump to punish 'job traitor' firms (BBC) 

         true

4.Blonds Are Going Extinct (Science) 

false

5. At Liberty University, All Sins Are Forgiven on the Altar of Football.(New York Times)

      

true

6.   Americans Love the Iranian and North Korean Presidents (Iranian News Agency FARS)

false

7.  Rochester to spend $70 million in public money to connect every home with fiber-optic cable.  

           (Democrat and Chronicle)

true

8.  Stores sell out of Pumpkin-spiced flavored condoms  (DIGG.com)

false

9. A night of music and dancing turns into a deadly inferno (LA Times)

true

10.The iPhone 5 Will Have Hologram Projection (Gizmodo)

false

REwriting Leads

Directions: Open up a word document. Follow the instructions for each of the sections below, where you will rewrite the eleven leads.  Send along, as usual.  These are due by the end of class on Thursday, December 15

Part 1: Condensing lengthy leads

Condense each of these leads to no more than two typed lines of no more than 20 words.

 1. Roger Datolli, 67, of 845 Conway Road, a retired attorney and husband of Mayor Sabrina Datolli, who is serving her fourth term as mayor, was injured in a three-vehicle accident Thursday afternoon around 3:20 p.m. at the intersection of Warren and Davidson avenues, suffering a broken leg and several broken ribs when the car he was driving was struck broadside by a pickup truck driven by Jerry R. Harris, 31, of 2245 Broadway Ave., and then was pushed into the path of another vehicle.

2. The city Planning and Zoning Commission met Thursday for its regularly scheduled  meeting and voted 3-2 to approve a joint plan by the city's Council of Government and the local Chamber of Commerce to renovate the core downtown business district by building a convention center and sports arena complex that will serve as a site for business meetings and conferences as well as possibly host a minor league hockey team on the Olympic-size ice rink planned for the site.

Part 2: Rewrite the following leads using the normal word order: subject, verb, direct object. Avoid starting the leads with a long clause or phrase. You may want to divide the lead into a couple of sentences. Correct any errors.

1.Wondering whether or not it was legally possible and if they could muster enough votes to support their desire to see changes implemented in the downtown historic section of the city, city council members Sandra Gandolf and Alice Cycler at the regular monthly city council meeting raised the issue of having the city's planning and zoning commission look into the possibility of creating a local board to oversee changes to buildings within the six-block downtown historic district.

2. Because the victim contributed in large measure to his own death by refusing medical attention that might have saved his life after the incident, James K. Arico, the 47-year-old man accused of stabbing him in the chest during an argument seven months ago, was allowed to plead guilty to assault today and was sentenced to six months in the county jail. He had been charged with murder.

Part 3. Rewrite the following leads, emphasizing the news, not the attribution*. Limit the attributions to a few words and place at the end, not at the beginning of the leads. 

* Attribution is stating who said something. Attribution is essential to all of the media, including radio and television. Readers or listeners need to know who is speaking or the information came from. 

1. At a news conference held at the Department of Energy in Washington, D.C., Monday afternoon the head of the agency told reporters that the Senate's approval of a plan to dump nuclear waste material in the Nevada desert near Las Vegas  will provide a safe haven for  more than 77,000 tons of radioactive waste.

2. Tracy Tibitts, Lisa Drolshagen and Dorothy Brayton, all members of the Delta Delta Delta sorority at Iowa State University, appeared in a local courtroom this morning and testified that the defendant, Steven House, appeared drunk when he got into his car to leave the party moments before he struck and killed the pedestrian.

Part 4: Rewrite the following leads in a single sentence, correcting errors if necessary. 

1. Mildred Berg, the former president of City College, is a professor of economics at the college now. Berg got a call Monday from David DeBecker, president of the Harrison County Board of Education. BeDecker offered Berg the job of superintendent of Harrison County Schools, a position Berg interviewed for two months ago.

2. At 10:41 a.m., two police detectives saw two men enter Barneys Liquor Mart in the Oak Hill Shopping Center. The shopping center is located in the 1300 block of Oak Hill Avenue. The men were acting suspiciously. When the detectives entered the store to investigate, they saw one of the men pointing a gun at the clerk and the other taking money from the register. The officers pulled their weapons and shot the man with the gun. There have been seven robberies at the shopping center in the past month.

Part 5. Stressing the unusual. Rewrite only the lead for each of the following stories, correcting errors if necessary.

1. Daniel J. Silverbach is a policeman in your community. Last year, because of his heroic rescue of seven persons held at gunpoint during a robbery, Police Chief Barry Kopperud named him the departments Police Officer of the Year. Kopperud fired Silverbach when he reported for duty at 7 a.m. today. The department adopted certain grooming standards, and Kopperud said Silverbachs mustache was a quarter inch too long and his sideburns a half inch too long, and he refused to trim them. Kopperud added that he warned Silverbach a month ago to trim his hair, then ordered him to do so at the first of last week. He fired him for failing to obey the order of a superior officer.   

                                                                             

     2. Terri Snow of 3418 Hazel St. is a nurse at Mercy Hospital. She is married to Dale Snow, a former eighth-grade science teacher at Mays Junior High School. Snow was crippled after a diving accident three years ago, when his arms and legs were paralyzed. He met his wife at the hospital, where he was a patient, and they were married last month. Now state officials have suggested that they get a divorce. Before his marriage, Snow received $345 a month from the states Department of Social Services and a monthly $792 federal Supplemental Security Income payment. Because of his wife's income, he is no longer eligible for the payments, and the couple says without the payments they cannot afford to pay for Snows continuing medical treatments and special diet. State officials have advised them that Snow will again become eligible for the aid if they get a divorce. The officials refused to talk to reporters, however.

 3.Cremation is rising in popularity. Nearly 30 percent of the people who die in your state are now cremated. The Funeral Directors Association in your state met at noon yesterday and discussed a growing problem. The ashes of nearly 50 percent of those people they cremate are never claimed by family members, friends or anyone else, so they are stored in the funeral homes, and the directors want to dispose of them but are uncertain of their legal right to do so. They voted to ask the state legislature to pass a bill that spells out disposal procedures. The bill they propose would require funeral homes to make every effort to settle with the family of the deceased the desired disposal method. Families would have up to 90 days to pick up the remains or to specify what they want done with them. After 90 days, the funeral homes would be free to get rid of them either by burying them, even in a common container (in a properly designated cemetery) or by scattering them at sea or in a garden, forest or pond.